So last night at small group, one I go through my church The Rock, and I felt so out of place. I recently decided I am going to pull away from The Rock and seek out another church. I arrived at the location and really thought I shouldn't have gone and could have had more fun elsewhere. As a few more people got there, I started to find myself doing voice overs in my head outlining what I knew and thought of everyone in the small group, very similar to the ones that Christian Bale's character did in American Psycho. I have written these down and will post them in one year, so that will keep you stayed tune. It made me know I need to move on, even during the lesson I couldn't bring myself to focus on the lesson because I have heard it before and felt I already practice it. The lesson was about being hospitable to your fellow man, I don't want to sound arrogant but I feel I already practice it, I know I should do it more but sometimes its not always possible. Over the course of the year in this small group, I feel I have not been challenged by the lesson, half the time we aren't learning we are serving the neighborhood around where we meet, which is good but my opinion is we should be learning and digging deeper.
I like the people in the group but how we function as a small group and how when people stop coming no one except me or one of the girls ever question where they are, talk about leaving someone behind :( I was excited for this small group when it started but that excitement has all but dwindled away, because it was not what I had expected.
So now I am faced with the decision of how soon to fully unplug from the rock, I want to by the end of the month but I know it wont be until the end of February. I checked out a huge mega church on Sunday with a friend but I feel I more comfortable in a slightly smaller arena. So I am checking out the church I went to before I started at The Rock, Mercy Vineyard, I feel I never gave that church a chance because I never checked out on of their small groups and really want to this time around to discover the community aspect of it.
So thats my story of the start of the end of my tenure at The Rock